So... I attended the Speak & Write Conference in Orlando just a few weeks ago and it inspired me to finally start writing my story. I figured I would talk about my adventures in Orlando, how I used the Law of Attraction to get me there and how I ended up on stage with Lisa Nichols from the movie, “The Secret”. It was after watching one of Lisa’s webinars that I was inspired to attend the conference this year in Florida, in spite of me initially believing it was an impossible dream just a few short months previous.
I had lived in Orlando many years ago and that experience had a huge impact on me and my life. Now, I felt the desire to return and I couldn't help but feel that, once again, a major life change was about to come over me. So I sat down to write about my amazing trip. I sat down to this several times and yet the words would not come. I developed a case of writers block and the words would not flow...in fact they would not even start, not even one word. “OK” I said to myself....”What do I need to write about then?” The answer came within an hour of me setting the intention. “Write about where you came from first”.
The following words are what flowed from me. It turned out to be a list of things I remember doing which showed the journey I have had over the years, moving from a place of depression to a place of feeling empowered.
107 Steps - My Journey From Depression To Empowerment 1. I first became aware that I might have it ( Thanks to two ladies at a holistic health fair who could both sense I had it whilst they carried out their treatments on me) 2. I accepted that I had depression 3. I did a lot of thinking 4. I got really good at “playing the victim” 5. I reached out for help – and didn’t get it 6. I started to declutter my home… every drawer, cupboard, room, every possession, every piece of paper. If I didn’t really need it or love it I threw it out 7. I cried …a LOT (ps…crying is good for you) 8. I watched box sets of greys anatomy for days on end (That was before tv bingeing was “a thing”) 9. I ate a LOT of chocolate 10. I slept a LOT 11. I felt numb for a long time 12. I faced and experienced rejection, loneliness and abandonment 13. I had some counselling 14. I became aware of patterns in my life 15. I took time off on sick from work 16. I got very comfortable being in my own company 17. I read and re-read some books that inspired me and changed me on a deep level (The Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield, Conversations with God by Neal Donald Walsch to name a couple) 18. I got ok about not always feeling ok 19. I learned that it was ok to get angry 20. I got really angry 21. I wrote a lot of things down that were in my head and my heart and then I burned those pages 22. I burned a LOT of stuff 😊 23. I got rid of a lot of “things” that were connected to my past 24. I got therapy to get rid of old stagnant emotions and energy that was trapped way down deep inside me, on a subconscious level 25. I faced my financial worries head on 26. I watched inspirational speakers and speeches on personal development, growth, mindset and spirituality. 27. I had colonic hydrotherapy…and literally got rid of a lot of sh*t that had been building up inside me 😉 28. I went on a mission to find myself and discover who I really was 29. I did a lot of soul searching 30. I went for Reiki healing and also did self-treatments on myself 31. I believed in Angels 32. I watched the movie, “The Secret”, a LOT 33. I listened to a LOT of Abraham Hicks 34. I learned that emotions are neither good nor bad….that they are simply energy in motion and that they were trying to tell me something. 35. I studied Neuro Linguistic Programming, Time Line Therapy and Hypnosis 36. I had a huge wake up call when I realised that it is ME …who creates my life 37. I explored and uncovered many limiting beliefs and decided to let them go 38. I took full responsibility for my life 39. I gave myself permission to “feel” 40. I embraced my emotions and learned to use them as my guidance system 41. I did more of what felt good and stopped doing things that didn’t 42. I faced my fears 43. I stood up to my bullies 44. I found my voice 45. I stood up and spoke up 46. I stopped hiding 47. I accepted myself 48. I got comfortable with being uncomfortable 49. I started to get to know my true authentic self 50. I dared to believe that my life could be so much better 51. I let go of negative people who were not helping me to move forward… the ones who liked me better when I was depressed and wanted me to stay that way 52. I learned how important it was to understand energy…mine and other peoples 53. I started putting ME first…a LOT 54. I started saying NO a lot more 55. I found courage within when I thought I had none left 56. I meditated 57. I prayed 58. I surrounded myself with positive people who supported me and encouraged me. (even if it was just one person – I was lucky to have one person and sometimes the only person was me) 59. I left my job…I Left several jobs 60. I moved house (more than once) 61. I got very honest with myself 62. I got very honest with others 63. I had difficult conversations with people that I didn’t want to have conversations with 64. I forgave people that I thought I could never forgive 65. I asked others to forgive me 66. I forgave myself 67. I spoke my truth and set myself free 68. I decided that I was never going back to such a dark place again 69. I upped my standards 70. I expected more from life 71. I stopped caring about what other people thought of me 72. I started caring more about what I thought of me 73. I started to believe in myself 74. I held on to the words of that friend who believed in me when I had lost all belief in myself 75. I resurrected my dreams 76. I reached out and asked for help…and this time…I got it 77. I began to follow my dreams with passion and purpose, one small step at a time 78. I stopped trying to control people and circumstances … and instead, I took control over HOW I reacted to people and circumstances. 79. I found my voice AGAIN 80. I started to love myself more and more 81. I held on to the belief that I create my own reality and therefore, if I didn’t like the reality I lived in, I was able to create a different, better and happier one 82. I became more and more aware every time I was “Playing the Victim” and stopped playing that game 83. I stopped blaming other people for how my life was and took back my power 84. I kept going, even though there were times I did give up along the way 85. I began to accept myself more and more 86. I learned to accept others 87. I began to discover what it really meant to “love myself”and started doing more of that (ps…this is a process) 88. I realised that sometimes my feelings…were NOT…”MY” feelings 89. I grounded and shielded my energy every day 90. I realise the importance of mindset 91. I spoke more positively to myself and to others 92. I set intentions 93. I set boundaries 94. I created vision boards for different areas of my life 95. I learned what being grateful really meant 96. I embraced the Power of Intention 97. I studied and applied the Law of Attraction principles in my life 98. I saw first hand, the connection between the body, mind and spirit and how I needed to address all of these aspects in order to heal fully 99. I got in touch with my higher self 100. I got in touch with my intuition 101. I stopped giving my power away to others 102. I got stronger mentally (ps…this is an ongoing process) 103. I learned to Let Go …and “go with the flow” 104. I trusted the universe was a friendly one and that it wanted to help me 105. I searched my soul to discover what truly brings me joy and a gave me a sense of purpose 106. I spoke to my soul and asked it what I was meant to do with my life 107. It said “teach all that you know to others” and so I wrote this - my first blog